Well, I have had some random thoughts going through my head this past week. Actually in pure honesty, I always have random thoughts running through my head. So many thoughts and thoughts are just spinning every where. It is kind of like they are drawn to each other and then they push away from each other just to join another thought. I wonder if when we pass from this life, we will be able to see the strategic process of which our thoughts are created from one thing to another.
Random thought #1: So, my sweet mother told me the other day that she sat down and read my blog. My mother is not too crazy about computers, so it was a compliment that she said that she read my entire blog. But, then she added--"I read others that were linked to your blog. You are definitely CRAZY." So, was that really a compliment or was it not?
Random thought #2: So, back to the random thought process. My sister-in-law shared with me a book entitled, Your Song by Mark Hoog. It is simply amazing. It talks about where to look and how to go about finding our gifts and talents in life. Basically, it makes you think about what makes up your song. So, that is what my random thoughts have been about--what is my song. How do I find my song? So, then that leads me to random thought #3.
Random thought #3: I received my patriarchal blessing shortly after I graduated from high school. Side note: I was really scared that when I went to receive my blessing, they would tell me I would die. (another blog entry for another day). So, when I received my blessing, I had an amazing experience. I do not think that it is appropriate to share in a blog. Anyway, there were a few particular things that I was listening for and when I heard those things, tears flowed and flowed and continued to flow until we were sitting quietly with the sweet Patriarch-tears flowing from his eyes as he hugged me and telling me that he wants to see and talk with me "when all is said and done."
So, as I think about my Patriarchal Blessing--is that my song. The problem is that with my blessing, I know that one thing has come to past--"I was born." My blessing is so detailed that it is easy to find out that I know that I was born. So, as I sit here tonight thinking about my very own song--not a lot of things come to mind, but I do have to admit that I struggle with what my song is all about.
Random thought #4: Tonight, I, as a Stake Young Women's leader, was invited to attend my ward's New Beginnings. Through out the day, I received an email from each member of the presidency stating that they would not be able to attend. So, that left, just me attending. As some of you know my heartache when it comes to my ward, you understand that it was extremely difficult to attend by myself. (Don't read anything in to this, I love our leaders in our ward. I know that they were called through revelation and through inspiration to lead these young women.) But, I did attend because I have been called to a position and set apart to be a servant of the Lord with the young women in my stake. It is amazing to know what you can do when the Lord is on your side. So, before I left work, I prayed that all will be well. Just to let you know--everything was fine. But, where my thought process goes is they focused on the Parable of the 10 virgins. We created and shaped our own oil lamps. It was amazing!!! So, then, I think about the oil lamp and how we worked and defined it--so, when we are creating our own song--it is just like the oil lamp--we work and we define.
Random thought #5: This past week, I had someone pop his head back into my life. This is definitely one of my struggles. I have almost gotten over the whole "popping out of my life" but now to pop back in--it is a struggle. Then, I think--is this part of my song. Why do people keep popping in and then popping out--just to pop in again? And, then, why do they pop back in.
Random thought #6: V made a comment the other day that everyone wants to be my BFF. I chuckle and giggle at this because I do not find that to be true. So, then, I think is this all part of my song? Maybe it is easier to have someone else write a song about you--maybe to see what people on the outside of your brain think versus what all the random thoughts inside are thinking about.
If you have made it through some of my random thoughts, bless your little heart. Have you ever thought about your song? If you haven't, think about it.
4 comments:
Michelle-you are truly amazing. Everyone does want to be your BFF, just look at how many awesome comments you get, and how many people read your blog, just to feel closer to you! You'll find your song someday, and when you do, I hope I'm there for you.
Interesting. That is such a cool concept. I know it is true, and I tend to be one of those people who lets life take me along instead of stopping it to put in key ingredients. I need to be more of a writer and less of a listener. I like my song but I know there are things missing that only I can put in. Did that make any sense?
I think about my "song" daily. I wonder if I am really making a difference in the lives of my children. I know I am, but I struggle with the mundane day to day problems.
I get so overwhelmed, that I struggle to see the "big picture," the fact that I can shape their characters into strong and capable young women who love the gospel. It's those days, that I think I am the worst mother ever.
But I am so thankful that Heavenly Father trusts me enough to send these little spirits into our family. He must see something in me that I fail to see in myself.
I need to get that book. Thanks for the recommendation!
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