thank you...

So, today's blog is on a more serious note....I have been struggling with the power of prayer. I have a firm foundation that when I pray for others, my prayers are answered in their behalf. When it comes to praying for something for me, I really struggle with having the faith that I will be answered. I know all the fundamentals of prayer, but I still really struggle when it comes to prayers in my behalf. Like I have said before, lately, I really struggle with this concept.

Yesterday in church, I felt that Fast & Testimony meeting had one main topic. The main topic was about the power of prayer. One elderly man stood and bore his testimony that earlier this week, he had lost the glass on one side of his glasses. He went to the bathroom and prayed. When he turned to walk out of the bathroom, he felt something on the floor and there was his glass piece. Is this coincidence? I say, NO. It is a answer to his prayer. Anyway, through out all of church, people were sharing their experiences of the power of prayer and how their prayers have been answered. I was really feeling horrible. My prayers don't get answered like that. Maybe they do...for instance, when I pray in the morning before I leave for work and ask for no harm or accident to come upon me or my family--maybe that protection is instant and I am not ran over or anything of the sort. But, what I mainly am talking about is those moments where I am debating over something, lost something or ... you know those moments that I am talking about. I don't get that immediate answer.

So, here is my story for today. A few weeks ago--actually, I know the exact date--Saturday, July 5th, I had in my hand a stack of very important papers that contained sensitive and confidential records. I remember the last time that I had them in hand (or at least I thought), but I misplaced them somewhere along the way. Later that night, the thought came to me--where did I place those papers? I thought for a moment and remembered them being in my young women's folder. I went to the folder and they were not there. So, I started looking for them that day. I prayed and prayed. I could not remember where I set them down.

I went to young women's camp with those papers lost. I witnessed all these wonderful miracles and the power of prayer. But, still in my mind--I was thinking about those papers and how I was struggling more and more with my own prayers and the lack of faith that I was feeling.

I arrived home...still no papers. I prayed and prayed. I could not figure out where they were. I felt like I was really listening, but the answer was not coming. I needed those papers. I searched and searched. I went through every piece of paper that I had. I re-traced my steps over and over again.

So, this process has been going on for almost a month. I have worried every single day about these papers. But, still I had no clue of where they were. Anyway, today work was kind of slow (which is very unusual) so, I decided to take a few hours off and declutter my garage. (I will share the reasons for this declutter project at a future date--different topic--different story to share.) I went through boxes and boxes, I took many trips to the dumpster. Before, I started this project, I asked for Heavenly Father's help. I needed to find those papers. After working on the garage for about 3 hours, I became more and more discouraged. I drove to Mom and Dad's. Mom has been aware of this ugly torment inside of me. I think that I probably looked horrible when I entered Mom's house. She said to me that we should go back over everything. I kept thinking...how many times do I have do this...So, we went through all the paper work in their computer room. We went through the garbage pail (okay, there is no reason my papers would be in there--it was a month ago). But, we did. We searched and searched.

Then, we decided to go through her trunk in her car. No papers. Then, we went through my stuff in my trunk. I had a bunch of scrapbooking items in my trunk and a few odds and ends. We went through things piece by piece. No papers. Then, I handed my mom a little sack.

So, let me tell you about this sack...This sack was a sack that had some things in it from when I taught a lesson for ward conference (from about 2 months ago). OK, I had been meaning to throw the stuff away. I really do not know why I had not thrown it away. When I packed my trunk for girl's camp, I am not sure why I had left that little sack in my trunk. So, when I handed it to my Mom. I told her that it was garbage and just to throw it away. She opened it up and we both just stared at it and then, we both started crying. In that little sack...was the papers that I lost a month ago. There is no rhyme or reason those papers should have been in that sack. But, they were. My precious papers!!!! I could not believe my eyes. My prayer and the prayers of so many in my behalf had just been answered. I know that I will have a good night sleep tonight!!! No more worrying about those papers. As I think about it again...I know that it was completely a 100% miracle and I know that our Heavenly Father DOES answers our prayers. I am not sure what I needed to learn for this prayer to take so long to answer, but I am thankful that I finally received an answer.

"thank you".